Pauses

Can you press pause on life

and set out and leave anytime

Not once not twice

but its been several times.

Something that goes in circle

has a habit of coming around

How hopelessly foolish am I 

expecting a different result every time.

It all started almost a decade back

and its all still the same

the excuses, the trivial reason of fights

The nothingness of empty promises 

Took all the wrong decisions 

Left my life behind 

Dove into the unknownness

Trusting something that doesn't exist

Who's fault is this 

Who's to blame 

Man acts as his nature predicts

Isn't that all it is.

You choose to pause our life 

Abandoned again

In stress and disease 

leaving chaos behind 

for me to deal with 

It's not a complaint

A late realization of patterns 

Jus that's it

I had given you the right

To treat me 

like I deserve this

Does your conscience say anything 

Choices you've made 

and accord broken 

Head held high you still walk like this

Nothing happened 

And all my feelings are bullshit 

Unfixable past 

and melancholy everywhere 

Endure in dismay

Or leave this crusade 

It's time to pause again 

Am clearing my head

Move forward, move on

And let my spirit escape 

Affliction of your pauses.

LCO Original - Charcoal Sketch

 

Surviving Demons Within

Burn in the rage of vengeance

Let the crimson blood drench your soul

Call your darkest demons

And let 'em loose in the arms of night

Punish the one who deserve

Let the darkness take over

That’s your true purpose

Cleaning the mess of creators

Satisfy your lust of vanity

A self-righteous being standing tall

Riding alone in the long night

City on fire and dead everywhere

Laugh at the face of survivors

Let ‘em fear for their meaningless existence

Burn everyone to ashes

And let them suffer.

Now sun is coming out tearing the darkness

And river washing off all my anger

With Soft breeze in the morning

Breathing relief clearing my thoughts.

For a moment there I caught my reflection

Judging by my own rule, I utter to myself

“Serve every sole with what they deserve”

I paused with a stream of realization

"What do I deserve?"

Am I a monster

Or slaved to my own demons

What’s important,
What is the meaning of all these.

Was I clearing a mess

Or was leaving a chaos of ghastly dread

"What have I done?

What have I done?”

I kept repeating

Suddenly jumping straight

And was sitting on my bed

Waking up from the shudder nightmare

Filled with remorse

And cried for hours

Facing my reflection

I took an oath

Taking one day at a time

Fighting my own crimes

Demons will rest in every soul

Keeping mine in leash

is about my own restrain

Creator!! Let me survive myself

Help me battle my darkness 

Fighting each day

Let me burn in my own rage

But Help me!! Lord

For vengeance shall never take control